Chapter 9: THE LAYOVERS

THE LAYOVERS

After a while, I ignored this unexcited feeling. I tried to be positive and look forward to my upcoming flights. Having a positive mindset can change a lot. Of course being positive the whole time is difficult but I believe that if we lose our positivity we lose everything in life. With this mindset, I awaited my upcoming flights, my first layovers. A layover means that you will stay in the country for at least a day and that’s quite exciting right? My upcoming layovers at that time were: Canada, Morocco, and South Africa

It was finally time to start preparing for my first flight, Montreal Canada. I usually don’t know what to pack for my flight and end up taking too many clothes and shoes. On the other hand, it is important to have enough so you have choices. Canada at that time was very cold and snowy, so I needed to pack my winter coat as well. All set and ready for this 12 hour flight where you, as a flight attendant have 3 hours of rest in the aircraft. I got picked up on time and proceeded to the airport. After a while, we started the boarding and the passengers prepared for the long flight ahead. I immediately spotted this family of four with two cute little kids, a boy and girl. During the flight I spoiled the kids with a lot of snacks and every time I walked by, this little girl wanted to grab my arms and give me a hug. It was a very long but relaxed flight, all the passengers were nice and calm.

Arriving at the hotel we made plans with some of the crew to go for dinner. Within an hour we’d showered, changed and made our way to a restaurant near the hotel. Later that evening I went to the city as well and came back around 23.30h. Not too late because two girls and I had planned to rent a car and go to Quebec City the next day. What a beautiful road trip it was, we shared stories with each other and listened to a lot of music. One of the stories really touched my heart and was about one of the girls wanting to do something different, follow her dreams and live with her husband. Sadly, she was not able to do so now and was actually stuck with this job. Yes, she enjoyed this job somehow but wanted to spend her life with her husband. Arriving in Quebec was beautiful, it’s a city with European and North American influences. For me a very beautiful mixture of architecture. As the time passes by, we enjoyed each other’s company, had dinner and went home. The next day I went to the city in Montreal, which again has this mixture of architecture. A very beautiful, calm and loving city. I really enjoyed this atmosphere. As the three days in Canada flew by, it was time for my next destination: Morocco, Casablanca.

Two days later it was time for my other flight to Casablanca. During the flight, I met this loving and funny crew, who I will never forget. During the flight, we laughed so hard with each other. Also, this flight was quiet with no interesting passengers. Arriving in Casablanca, it was very hot outside and besides that, we had to wait for our supervisors because they wanted to buy some famous oil from the driver. As we were waiting this funny crew member said to me: “Daniel, I cannot believe we are buying products from the back of a car and we are talking about finesse in this company”. At that moment we laughed so hard. Other than that I visited this famous big mosque and had traditional food in a nice restaurant. You do have some nice and modern places in Casablanca but most of it is very old. 

After this flight, I only had 12 hours of rest and then I was off to South Africa Johannesburg. I didn’t sleep properly and wasn’t well rested for this 9-hour flight. Even though I was tired, I was ready for this adventure to South Africa as it was always my dream to visit South Africa. The flight was busy which kept me awake. To be honest I’d rather have a busy flight than a flight where there is nothing to do. Finally, we arrived in Johannesburg where there is this famous safari called Lion Park. Even though I was very tired, I dragged myself to go. This is the most tiring part of the job, where u had a long and exhausting flight but still want to go out and see the country. Arriving at the lion park was disappointing, it was just a very big cage with a couple of lions and cheetahs in it. Not a proper safari, like I had anticipated. Even though the tour was disappointing, we ended up playing with the baby lions, which was so magical. A real dream came true. We ended the day drinking and eating at the Nelson Mandela Square. 

On our way back to the airport, a 1-hour drive, I enjoyed the landscape of beautiful South Africa. We also did the flight briefing on the bus. Sometimes briefings are quick and nothing special, but other times supervisors talk about all the safety and security issues. Sometimes even what to do in an evacuation or medical situation. The moment they start to talk about it, I imagine all these awful things and just hope that nothing will happen on our flight. We arrived at the airport and proceeded to the aircraft. During the service, there was this Arabic kid (5 years old) and as I gave him his meal, he very rudely replied with: “no take this back, I don’t want it and don’t like it”. He even made this ‘take it back’. hand gesture. Imagine... A five year old. At that point, I sarcastically responded with: “you don’t like it? Shall I take it back?”. Like I mentioned before, often there is no need to respond to certain things.  After the service, 3 hours into the flight, we finally sat down and had dinner. While enjoying my meal, speaking to my colleagues and looking out the window, we suddenly heard this loud scream in the cabin…I looked at my colleague and said SHIT.

Chapter 8: KEEPING CALM

KEEPING CALM

I believe that the key to responding to people who are angry or disrespectful is to calm yourself and stay calm while responding. Seriously, for me, there is no point in responding angry or disrespectful back. It only drains your own energy and makes the situation worse. Clearly, the person doesn’t know how to behave, and I would like to show the person, that I grew up with manners and of course know how to treat people. When I saw this person yelling at me, I was in shock, I didn’t know right away what to say, but for sure yelling back and disrespecting him was not an option for me. So when he was finished, I looked at my colleague and then looked at him and responded with: “Sir, I believe you are waiting for your food and you are very hungry? This is not the way you talk to people, but I’m more than happy to give you our 5-star service after serving these customers in front of you. Thank you”. My good friend always tells me this famous quote: “When they go low, we go high”. Of course, sometimes we can get so angry, but if you think about it, there is really no point in replying disrespectfully. Usually, when people act like that, they don’t know better, they don’t have the proper education, are narrow-minded or it’s just a cultural thing. The important thing is to make sure you tell them, that the way they talk to you, should stop immediately.

After some hours we were flying back to our home base and the flight was peaceful. We were flying all morning and arrived home around 10.00am. I came home, took my uniform off and went immediately for a shower. This is the best part of coming home after a flight. I then jumped in my bed and answered some messages. Suddenly I wasn’t tired anymore, this feeling when you want to sleep, but you just cannot sleep. Very irritating, so started staring outside my window and thinking about certain things. I just had my first flight as a flight attendant, something I always wanted to do. I was clearly living my dream, but you know, I wasn’t excited at all. Maybe because of the customer, but I didn’t really have a feeling. What could it be? Was I just tired, but couldn’t sleep? Maybe this is not really my thing; but how could you say that after one flight? I closed my eyes and told myself that I will enjoy it more, for now, let’s just sleep.

Later that day, I woke up around 06.00pm, started texting people to know if they are in town. Sadly everyone was having flights or already on minimum rest, so they couldn’t leave the apartment. Well, that’s how my day ended, having dinner by myself and making myself tired in order to sleep. My next flight was the next day in the evening, so I decided just to watch movies, gym and stay in my apartment till my next duty.

Finally, it was time for my next flight and I started preparing myself for this flight to Karachi, Pakistan. Again Pakistan. The best thing about this job (besides seeing all the countries) is that the customer profile is very diverse. Every time new people, new attitudes and new behaviors. While preparing I was just hoping that the customers will be relaxed and kind, so not like my first flight. But on the other hand, it makes the job exciting and there is some action. Haha. I put on my uniform and headed to the airport to get on the flight. Luckily this time I got my briefing question right and we were all ready to operate the flight. The flight was full, and we started boarding (customers entering the aircraft and taking their seats) a little bit early, to leave on time. The best part of boarding or what I usually do, is to spot good-looking people, hope they sit in my zone, so I can look after them during the flight. For me that is what makes the flight exciting and fun. Of course, the crew as well. Suddenly this customer enters the flight, very cute long hair and casually dressed. Well, not in my zone, but on my side, so I had to walk by a couple of times. Suddenly the customer says not to wake her up during the flight and she wants a blanket, because it was cold. A little attitude and suddenly she wasn’t that good-looking anymore. Again a sign that beauty from the outside is important but from the inside is way more important. I asked my colleague for a blanket, but she forgot to bring it and even I forgot to crosscheck with the crew if they gave her the blanket. After 30 minutes, this customer calls me and tells me with even more attitude like before: “Uhmmm… I asked you for a blanket, it has been 1 hour already and still nothing... it is really cold here you know”. I apologized and gave her the blanket. After a while we were ready for landing and my colleague was getting the cabin ready for landing. This particular person was sleeping with her blanket over her head, so we had to wake her up by tapping her on the shoulder. We did this a couple of times by saying: “Mam...Mam...Mam”. Suddenly this customer wakes up and started shouting saying: “Don’t wake me up and that’s not how you wake me up. You have to say excuse me and don’t touch me”. I was just standing there, shocked and started laughing. You know, some people are just ridiculous and at this moment I don’t have time for this sh*t. I looked at her and said: “Mam, we are ready for landing, prepare yourself. Thank you”. Well first impression can be wrong. In this case VERY WRONG!

Again, a hectic flight, happy to be home, showered and jumped in my bed. At that point, I wasn’t really feeling the moment of excitement I should feel. I mean, I’m living my dream and still I’m not excited or enthusiastic about it. How could this be? Living an actual dream should be an amazing feeling, right? Well, I think we can be wrong sometimes about our dreams and its more than ‘ok’ to realize that something you always wanted, is not what you thought it was. 

Chapter 7: THE BEGINNING OF

THE BEGINNING OF

Looking at my watch and seeing the time, really scared me. I had this anxious feeling and I started breathing heavily. Why did I allow the alcohol to take over and why am I not responsible enough to get home in time? As I walked out of the restroom, I somehow managed to find my friends dancing at the bar. I ran to them and told them that we had to leave right away. They somehow didn’t respond and kept on enjoying the music. “Come on, we have to leave now! We are late and won't reach home in time” I yelled. Somehow, they didn’t seem bothered and I started doubting myself in a weird way. Suddenly my friend came to me and said: “Daniel, Relax! Its only 1.46am. We will leave in two hours, we will get you home safe”. At that moment I looked at my watch and indeed… I’d made a mistake, we still had enough time to enjoy ourselves. Relief washed over me, because how stupid would it be to break the rules on the first day. 

As we enjoyed the night, it was time for us to go home. We called a taxi, asked him to bring us to our accommodation and he did. Before disembarking we told each other to act normal, sober and walk straight to our building. There are often cases where the security reports crew, because they were too drunk to walk to their building. Whenever something like this happens, you will receive a letter from the company that you have to come and explain yourself. Being in the middle east and especially in this company, you must avoid all these things. The trick is to live this anonymous life, where no one really knows you exist. So far, I’ve managed to maintain the anonymous life. We counted to 3, disembarked and slowly walked into the accommodation. Really focused, completely silent and eyes on the destination we walked towards our building. We were with the four of us and were doing pretty well. You would never have noticed that we had even taken a sip of alcohol. Meters away from our building, my friend said he couldn’t take it anymore and that he felt like he had to throw up. “No, please…we are almost there, and you are almost in your room, please bear with us!”. Suddenly a security guard was meters behind us. Shit…Ok, listen.. whatever we do, walk fast and please don’t throw up. Breath in and breath out. At that moment the it seemed like the building was moving away from us and the guard was getting closer and closer. I was so nervous at that time and prayed that my friend would make it to the building. Suddenly my friend started coughing and I thought, this is the end. Exactly when he started coughing the security walked pass us, but luckily, we made it to our building safely. Thank god we did.

That morning I showered, went straight to bed and slept for 10 hours. Waking up, I was already on my minimum rest (12 hours before the flight) because I had my first ever flight the next day. Again, I woke up with this empty feeling but also excited for my first ever flight. I’d managed to survive the two months of training and would finally start doing what I’d come for. My first two flights were observation flights. This means that you observe what the others do, but you participate as much as possible. Four hours before the reporting time, I started preparation for the flight. Preparing for the flight is all about checking the destination, flight number, flying time, the crew onboard, time difference and the service we will be doing. My very first flight was a turnaround to Pakistan, Islamabad. Turnaround means that we will land in the country, wait for 1 hour, welcome new passengers and fly back to our home base. About the flight, there was nothing really positive to say and I remember my instructor saying: “Guys, just hope that you don’t have Islamabad as your observations flight, because it will make u hate your job”. Of course, lucky me, I had it as my first observation flight and to put a cherry on top, it was overbooked.

An hour before my pick-up time, I started to get ready. I cleanly shaved, which is a must whenever going on a flight, brushed my teeth and applied crème. Again, I felt this excited feeling coming up. A feeling which reflected on actually living a dream. I wore my uniform and it was time to go to the crew center. The crew center is a separate area, were all the cabin crew gathers, does their briefing and goes through security. Whenever this is done, we embark the crew bus and go to our aircraft. The briefing started right on time, with a round of introduction. During the introduction, you say your name, where you’re from and how long you’ve been flying. When the introduction is done, we discuss the information about the flight and then we have a grooming check. There is a grooming check before every flight, which means that the grooming officer checks each crew, to make sure they look representable and up to standards to go on the flight. Whenever this is done, the supervisor asks safety, security and first aid questions. Each crew gets one question. She started with safety and security and I was hoping to get a very easy question at that time. At that time I was thinking about everything we’d learned in training, still hoping to get a very easy question and preferably not a first-aid question. Suddenly it was my turn, … first-aid. “what is the breathing rate of an adult, Daniel?” Shit… I didn’t know… and luckily this other crew member helped me out and the supervisor was super nice.

It was time to go to the aircraft and do the flight. My very first crew was super nice and helped a lot. We came on the aircraft and started doing our safety check and security search. At this time, we do all the pre-flight checks of the equipment onboard and check if there are no prohibited items in the aircraft. Again, they warn me about this flight and the rudeness of the passengers. It was time for boarding and my colleague came to me and said: “Daniel, this can be a difficult flight, customers are rude, but just be nice and stay calm. Do your best”. After a couple seconds, the first customer boarded the aircraft, looking all angry and not amused. After that the other customers came. It was a mix of happy, angry, not amused and quiet people. After a while, boarding was completed, and we were ready to go. After 20minutes in the air we started to service, and they gave me cart. I was quite nervous and started to feel hot. Not sure if its my nerves or just the temperature in the aircraft. After serving some people, it happened. The situation the crew warned me about. While I was serving a customer another one started yelling at me. Like loudly yelling at me and saying: “you are going too slow, I am hungry, and I paid for this shit. I want my meal and my drinks now. I cannot believe how slow and stupid you are. How can u make me wait? I Paid and want a good and fast service”. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, my mind was running wild. This is not what I signed up for and this is not how I imagined the job. This is not how you treat people. I looked at the customer and after he was done yelling in the whole cabin, it was my time to respond and believe me, when it comes to disrespect I’m not afraid to lose my job.

Chapter 6: THE END OF TRAINING

THE END OF TRAINING

Discovering that GB was living a double life, made me really angry and sort of sad. Angry because I was proofed wrong. I thought of this person in a way that was completely wrong. How could this person make me believe such a lie? I’d discovered that GB was in other relationships while telling me, I was the only one. Thinking back, I can only laugh at myself. How stupid could I be? But you know life here is very lonely, so people get attached faster and break morals easier because of their loneliness. I’d experienced the same, I’d given in to GB too fast because I was lonely and looking for a distraction. I made it clear to myself, I will always believe in love but for now, love or a relationship is not what I’m looking for. I will continue to work on myself, my behavior and attitude towards a romantic relationship to be at my best when the right one crosses my path. I still believe that the right one is out there waiting for me.

After all this, I was in the last part of the training (Cabin Service Training). Days were going by pretty quickly but it was still hard to adjust. The training was very practical with a lot of scenarios. I really enjoyed that part, because there wasn’t much to study. We were constantly laughing at people doing scenarios and received food (which we serve onboard) at the end of each day. My friend MD and I were always hungry, so we’d keep grabbing more food, even when others had not eaten yet. The trainer always asked who took more and we’d look at each other and continue to enjoy our second or even third meal. This is the reason why I get along with MD, we both enjoy being naughty and ‘breaking rules’ all the time.

There was also another reason why I did enjoy this part of the training. It was because of the trainer (BM). She was a kind of mother figure who inspired the group all the time and who was always there for people if they needed anything. Often, she shared personal motivating stories and I could just sit there in class for hours and listen to her. She had this way of speaking, which really made people pay full attention. On the other hand, she was also very rebellious, she did what she thought was right and the word ‘fear’ for anyone or anything was not in her dictionary. One day, during training I was fully focused and looking at her and I don’t know why, but I really felt this connection with her.

Finally, the training was over and done and I was officially a flight attendant. During the graduation (Wings day) I received an award for being the best in serving hot beverages. Proud moment. During graduation, the boys and girls come together in one room and can finally talk to each other. Stupid right? During training, you cannot talk and suddenly they promote talking to each other and to get along. Of course, all guys and even the girls were very excited to talk to each other, because two months being around the same gender makes u go crazy from time to time. It was very strange. Anytime a girl walked by, the guys got all excited, started laughing and making crazy faces at each other. Imagine being in prison for years…. Haha. We finished the wings day by cutting three cakes. During this moment I took a step back, looked around me and realized one of my dreams had really come true. I’d always wanted to do this and look at me all the way in the middle east as a flight attendant for a top-ranked company. Dreams do really come true and if you don’t give up, great things can be achieved. I was really proud of myself at that moment because I’d survived and pushed through the ‘90 minutes (being outside) rule’ for two months. After the graduation some rules changed, whenever we are free we can stay outside till 4:00 am and before a flight (pick up time) we must be inside 12 hours prior. These is referred to as minimum rest. Breaking the minimum rest, means termination right away. Explanation about breaking the rest will not be asked.

That same day we planned a graduation party with all the people from Wings day. It was like we were celebrating the fact that we were officially free people. It was a bittersweet feeling. A feeling of indeed being free but somehow not the freedom I was seeking. However, I was excited about the party and ready to go all out. The plan was to pre-drink at a hotel where we get 50% off on alcohol and then go to the nightclub to dance. At 8 pm I arrived at the party and immediately ordered a bottle of wine. I was enjoying it and talking to a lot of people. At some point, we even started taking shots at the bar. Inside the hotels and clubs is a completely different world, a western world. At some point, we arrived at the nightclub, which had some good music. I continued to order drinks and realized that I had to stop as I was getting really drunk. The thing with drinking is, you always convince yourself that you can take on more glass and I had to celebrate my freedom of course.

My friend and I decided to take another shot and at that point, we completely lost control over ourselves. Things started to move slowly around me, I couldn’t hear the music clearly and standing straight was very difficult. People started leaving the nightclub. While all this was going on, my vision was really fading away and I couldn’t really talk to anyone. I said to myself that I had to stop drinking and order water. Before that, I went to the restroom to pour some water on my face in order to focus again. As I poured water over my face, I looked at myself in the mirror and then took a look at my watch.......… 3.46AM......